It’s Still Gun Control to Me

It’s Still Gun Control to Me

sung to the tune of “It’s
Still Rock and Roll to Me” with apologies to Billy Joel.

There’s nothing wrong with the flak jacket I’m wearing.
Can’t you tell I’m from the United States?
When the NRA stops lobbying government
we’ll return to the age of debates.

The nation’s banned from hanging out lately, honey.
Politicians start caring when they lose a lot of money.

It’s about time they fall in line, reduce crime, grow a spine.
It’s still gun control to me.

There’s nothing wrong with the Hummer I’m driving.
But it should be out of style.

Should I send a set of money wires
so that they can campaign for a while?
Nowadays, all the rage is security.
Balance it with freedoms that will determine our futurity.

It’s about time they fall in line, reduce crime, grow a spine.
It’s still gun control to me.

Oh, it doesn’t matter what they say in their speeches
’cause their kind of talk has always been cheap.
There’s a new issue in town but they can’t win the round
’cause the opponent’s pockets are too deep.
And the short news-cycle appeases the sheep.

How about a pair of bright-line rulings
and life-saving, background-check bills?
They can really be the voters’ hero
if voters know how their nation kills.

https://www.gunviolencearchive.org/last-72-hours

Don’t waste your time on a new set of distractions!
They should compromise and take some actions!
It’s about time they fall in line, reduce crime, grow a spine.
It’s still gun control to me.

There’s something wrong with the crowd government’s seeing.
Don’t you know that they’re out of touch?
If you try to vote them out of office,
they’ll use a COVID lockdown as a crutch.

Don’t you know about our government, honey?
All you need is power and whole lot of money.

It’s about time they fall in line, reduce crime, grow a spine.
It’s still gun control to me.

Everybody’s talkin’ about Donald Trump, funny
but it’s still gun control to me.

King of the Rogues – BONUS POST

What do the following individuals have in common?

Joe Palazzolo
Jimmy Vielkind
Rebecca Davis O’Brien
Lisa Schwartz
Corinne Ramey
Eric Lutz
Morgan Chalfant
Elliot Hannon
Daniel Marans
Phoebe McRae
Matt Troutman
Zak Failla
Mary Altaffer
Robert Pelaez
Herb Scribner
Jake Lauhut
David Robinson
Michael Hill
Marina Villeneuve
Jennifer Peltz
Rachel Stracqualursi
Rachel Cohrs
Alex Yablon
Eric Lach
David Sirota
Julia Rock
Nicole Hong
William K. Rashbaum
Jesse McKinley
Luis Ferré-Sadurní
Aaron Katersky
Virginia Chamlee
MJ Lee
Mark Morales
Lauren del Valle
Chas Danner
Matt Stieb
Caroline Linton
Bill Mahoney
Tom Tapp
Rich McKay
Sydney Pereira
Matthew S. Schwartz
Keshia Clukey
Shelly Banjo
Michael Hernandez
Peter Wade
Bernadette Hogan
Carl Campanile
Bruce Golding
Tracey Alvino
Jennifer Lewke
Will Feuer
James Agresti
Nick Reisman
Andrew Stein
Fred Siegel
Victor Garcia
Chris Bragg
Amanda Fries
Ann McCloy
Tom Dinki
Zack Budryk
Stephanie Ruhle
Joaquin Sapien
Joe Sexton
Mollie Simon
Benjamin Hardy
Robert Harding
Tobias Hoonhout
Marisa Schultz
Denis Slattery
Kaylee McGhee White
Jim Mustian
Jennifer Peltz
Bernard Condon
Julia Ritchey
Allie Griffin
Orion Rummler
Amanda Chin

Here’s a hint– a parody in connection with Andrew Cuomo, current governor of New York State:

KING OF THE ROGUES
sung to the tune of “King of the Road” with apologies to the estate of Roger Miller.

Smearers of Cuomo are bent
on putting in their two cents.
Accusations, gossip, rumors;
many loud, noisy doomers.
Ah, but two minutes of rewriting text
drowns out, all Cuomo says next.
His end is on the receiving end, King of the Rogues.

Two scandals knock him out, of any future political bout.
He can’t fight City Hall.
Oh, the irony of it all.
No matter what he’s done before,
he’ll be spat on forevermore.

His end is on the receiving end, King of the Rogues.

He learned from his daddy in every campaign,
all of his contacts, and all of his games.
For years and years in every town.
Too bad too much history brings the son down.

And now, smearers of Cuomo are bent
on putting in their two cents.
Accusations, gossip, rumors;
many loud, noisy doomers.
Ah, but two minutes of rewriting text
drowns out, all Cuomo says next.
His end is on the receiving end, King of the Rogues.

Smearers of Cuomo are bent
on putting in their two cents.
Accusations, gossip, rumors;
many loud, noisy doomers.
Ah, but two minutes of rewriting text
drowns out, all Cuomo says next.
His end is on the receiving end, King of the Rogues.

Do It Again

DO IT AGAIN

(regarding the impeachment trial, of course)

sung to the tune of “Do It Again” with apologies to the Beach Boys.

It’s nostalgic when I
confer with old friends,
like the Constitution
and the Trump we knew
when his behavior was bad and mean
and the court was the place to go.

Legal logic and
waves of questions,
the Washington crowd and
beautiful drama,
warmed up lawyers. Let’s
get together and do it again.

With reams of evidence the latest case looks good.
The Dems can’t help but take a parting shot.

Time to move on.

Move.
Move.
Move.
Move.
Move.

Mm hmm.
Mm hmm.
Mm hmm.
Mm hmm.
Mm Hmm.

Well, I keep looking at

all the things we’ve Tweeted and posted
and all the

zingers we’ve missed so let’s get
back together and do it again.

Counsel Counsel Counsel…

COUNSEL CHAMELEON

Sung to the tune of “Karma Chameleon” with apologies to Culture Club. This is the song Trump is singing now.

There are a lot of pesky laws in my way.
I lose more legal guys every day.

I don’t want a conviction.
But it’s clear I don’t know
how to sell
all my fictions.
It’s touch and go.
It’s touch and go.

Counsel counsel counsel counsel counsel chameleon,
it’s touch and go.
It’s touch and go.
Nothing is easy ’cause my lawyers don’t like my schemes.
But it’s free speech! But it’s free speech!

I’m allowed to speak my mind anytime.
And if my props obey, it’s not a crime.
You know my hate is an addiction.
What I say is never wrong.
Don’t think I’m gone, gone forever.
I will return, I will return.

Counsel counsel counsel counsel counsel chameleon,
it’s touch and go.
It’s touch and go.
Nothing is easy ’cause my lawyers don’t like my schemes.
But it’s free speech! But it’s free speech!

The Constitution allows some lenience.
I upheld it, at my convenience.
The Constitution allows some lenience.
I upheld it, at my convenience.

I don’t want a conviction.
But it’s clear I don’t know
how to sell
all my fictions.
It’s touch and go.
It’s touch and go.

Counsel counsel counsel counsel counsel chameleon,
it’s touch and go.
It’s touch and go.
Nothing is easy ’cause my lawyers don’t like my schemes.
But it’s free speech! But it’s free speech!

Counsel counsel counsel counsel counsel chameleon,
it’s touch and go.
It’s touch and go.
Nothing is easy ’cause my lawyers don’t like my schemes.
But it’s free speech! But it’s free speech!

Counsel counsel counsel counsel counsel chameleon,
it’s touch and go.
It’s touch and go.
Nothing is easy ’cause my lawyers don’t like my schemes.
But it’s free speech! But it’s free speech!

Counsel counsel counsel counsel counsel chameleon…

Our Leaders Are Like Teens

OUR LEADERS ARE LIKE TEENS
sung to the tune of “Only In My Dreams” with apologies to Debbie Gibson.

The powers-that-be are keeping secrets.
We need to end their gravy train.
We’re losing our democracy,
in shrill-whining-Debbie-Gibson pain.

We must return to basic civics,
and regulate again.
Bring back laws on guns and Wall Street,
and cut how much we spend.

Yes, our leaders are like teens
with their social schemes.
They manipulate the scenes.

We need a lot more governing.
Not more polls. Not more Tweets.
Now we see our world come tumbling down.
Now all they see are Party seats.

Congress has to get the tough votes,
and go back to how it used to be:
The good bills got enough votes.
We’ll know again how it feels to be free.

Yes, our leaders are like teens
with their social schemes.
They manipulate the scenes.

Yes, yes, yes, yes our leaders are like teens
with their social schemes.
They manipulate the scenes.

Yes, our leaders are like teens
with their social schemes.
They manipulate the scenes.

Yes, yes, yes, yes our leaders are like teens
with their social schemes.
They manipulate the scenes.

Yes, yes, yes…

Precarious

PRECARIOUS

sung to the tune of “Aquarius” with apologies to the Fifth Dimension.

When the boss was in the White House
and his cult confronted cops
then violence guided their protest
and hate did steer his props.

This is the dawning of the age of Precarious.
The age of Precarious.
Precarious! Precarious!

Scare-tactics and grandstanding,
hypocrisy, mistrust abounding.
Only falsehoods and derisions.
Hyper-hostile party divisions.
Economic devastation
and government’s deliberation.
Precarious! Precarious!

When the boss was in the White House
and his cult confronted cops
then violence guided their protest
and hate did steer his props.

This is the dawning of the age of Precarious.
The age of Precarious.
Precarious! Precarious!

As the votes got counted through the night,
can’t wait to inaugurate
to be the bearers of the new world order.
Only time will tell our fate.

We’re in the clutches of the age of Precarious.
The age of Precarious.
Precarious! Precarious!

Scare-tactics and grandstanding,
hypocrisy, mistrust abounding.
Evil, evil machinations,
germs-and-bullets consternation,
wrong-headed in policy courses
guided by historical forces.
Oh dear, us. Precarious.

Message in A Black Hole – BONUS POST

Message in A Black Hole
sung to the tune of “Message in A Bottle” with apologies to The Police.
A song Trump is singing now.

Just a castaway, but I don’t want to concede, oh.
With more votes, I’ll get back in the lead, oh.
More lawyers than anyone could bear.
I haven’t any shame so I don’t care, oh.
I’ll send an SOS to the world.
I’ll send an SOS to the world.
I hope electors get my
I hope electors get my
I hope electors get my message in a black hole, yeah.
Message in a black hole, yeah.
Years have passed since I’ve won the globe
but I resist liberals’ every probe.
I hope my supporters can keep me in power.
I can win again and
I can break those Dems.
I’ll send an SOS to the world.
I’ll send an SOS to the world.
I hope electors get my
I hope electors get my
I hope electors get my message in a black hole.
Message in a black hole.
Oh, message in a black hole, yeah.
Oh, message in a black hole, yeah.
Rallied this morning.
You know what I saw.
Lots and lots of ballots in states that I adore.
Seems I’m in love with being loved.
Lots and lots of lawyers.
I can’t stand being snubbed.
I’ll send an SOS to the world.
I’ll send an SOS to the world.
I hope electors get my
I hope electors get my
I hope electors get my message in a black hole, yeah.
Message in a black hole, yeah.
Oh, message in a black hole, oh.
Oh, message in a black hole.
Sending out an SOS.
Sending out an SOS.
Sending out an SOS…